it is called growing up.

4 months since my last post. It’s November now, going on December. Where have i been all year? I feel like i spaced out for most part of the year. November. seriously? :(

It has been a trying weighing out my options. but maybe all i need is a break from it all.

is two weeks enough?


leaving for Hongkong in abit. at least i can blog about this self-funded trip.

uwaaa so out of my element. i don’t think ive ever been like this in my life.



i seek comfort in blogging. which is why i decided to blog this morning. the tragedy that swept the nation yesterday has left everyone in mourning. my condolences, thoughts and prayers go out to those who were directly effected by the incident. being only an outsider, i cannot begin to imagine what those who lost their loved ones are going through right now.

life’s unfair like that. But Allah knows best. He would only test the strongest minds to make them even stronger and to better prepare them for the future. whatever it may holds.

Although, this is always easier said than to actually believe, there’s always a silver lining to everything. That’s how you keep on going.

as i sit here, cross legged in my Korean apartment.. i can’t help but wonder what the future holds. It’s always the fear of not knowing that creeps up on you. especially in times of hardship.

A few weeks ago, i came across a stack of papers at work which i thought were documents. I looked at it closely and discovered that it was really a photocopied version of the book “The Alchemist” which belonged to one of the Pavilion staff. Curious, i sat down and read the first page and the next thing i knew, i was taking the ‘book’ home with me.

It was a beautiful piece of work that taught me the meaning of life in LAMEN TERMS. none of that Satanic verses “hee who thee thee who heee fee fi fo fum” shit.

I thought i’d share some of the excerpts in the book that really spoke to me:-

– “Don’t give in to your fears. If you do, you won’t be able to talk to your heart.” ? Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

– “I don’t live in either my past or my future. I’m interested only in the present. If you can concentrate always on the present, you’ll be a happy man. Life will be a party for you, a grand festival, because life is the moment we’re living now.” ? Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

Anyway, moving on to the topic of silver linings, I can say openly that i dont really favor this colleague of mine, it’s nothing personal though, but more work related. However, if i hadn’t met her and had she not been around to work with, I wouldn’t find this beautiful book. Even if it’s just a photocopied version …

and that’s a silver lining on its own.

anyway, it’s a brand new day, Alfatihah to those who lost their lives in the heli crash.

Stay strong everybody. Take comfort in the fact that everything always happens for a reason and seek protection and strength in your prayers.

kiss me.


I’ve just had rice for brekkie. It’s that time of the month again, but this time im craving rice. lots of it. and after the usual Bismilahirahmanirrahim i make another silent prayer loud enough in my head :- “please. god. please don’t let this plate of rice that is drenched in olive oil make me fat”.

I love rice. so much, that it makes me fat. Love in general makes people fat. Which is why one has to learn to love everything and anything within balance. God always comes first.

I have 35 more days till i get out of this place. The weather is getting hotter with a humidity of Belalong. It’s crazy. With ramadhan around the corner, i pray to god again.. to make me strong enough to withstand not having a drink in the middle of the day during Ramadhan.

It’s easier to fast when you’re back home cause everyone is doing it. It’s a totally different ball game when you’re overseas. exsp when you’re not in muslim territory. The fact that i’ve been assigned to work in a ‘theme park style’ setting makes it even harder.

I could just feel the thirst creeping in during the 1st day of Ramadhan. The gates of the EXPO would be like walking through the gates of where all the different kinds of diets go to die..let alone fasting. But i’m focused on getting it right this time around. i must. im 26. 27 in less than a month. it’s time to grow up and take on more responsibility. and this includes fulfilling my religion ..oh and financial saving. inshallah, god will give me the strength to be the better muslim that i can be :)

my shift starts at 10. i better mandi.

kiss me.


I’m still here and breathing (in garlic breath). After months of being here, i’ve finally cracked the code to the ultimate korean dream:- how to be skinny like the Korean girl sitting on the next table. It’s so simple. It’s not even rocket science.

Sitting here at the Japanese food court, my view is of a Korean woman centered around a group of rowdy korean men. She’s no doubt prettier than the average woman in South Korea long legs, facial features of a caucasian..or an artificial KOR-casian if i may say..and a body that would easily fit in to a SIZE XXXS “FREE SIZE” dress (i’ve come to realise that the FREE in FREE size stands for FAT GIRLS ARE “FREE” TO F OFF) She’s the type you would definitely see of cat-walking down the streets of Garosu-gil. It comes as a no brainer to why she is in the company of so many men.

So here i am, wondering what this free size wearing bitch will be having for lunch? as if judging my plate of rice, one of the men brought over a bowl of Vietnamese Pho over flowing with bean sprouts and placed it in front of her. And i’m here going: “pfft. i knew it!” but what really surprised me was the fact that the woman was asking for more bean sprouts from the other men. One by one, the men using their chopsticks, transferred their portion of bean sprouts in to the woman’s bowl and she was more than happy to gobble it all up …macam arnab.

and in my head, i was like: THIS IS WHY THEY’RE SKINNY. THEY LOOK LIKE WOMEN..but they’re actually rabbits. haha nadalah. im just jealous. all seriousness, they’re skinny because they eat more of vegetables than anything else. Upon my realisation, i saw that most of the women in the room were either having soup , vegetables or fruits for lunch.

Like a conspiracy theory, on the way back from the restaurant, i overheard a woman ordering a kebab and told the guy manning the stall that she wanted more veg and less meat in her kebab. A girl who passed by me on the escalator was carrying a container of mini tomatoes that i know would go down her throat like blueberries.

and they were ALL skinny girls.

so you see. all you need to be skinny around here are fruits and vegetables. for kro-casian features, well. you have the beauty clinics in Seoul for that.

next time, i’ll be carrying a SACK of TOMATOES up the escalators! WOOOOOOT.

kiss me.


If I’m still a blogger, then why am i never invited to blogger gatherings anymore? Now, wait a minute, I am not complaining nor am i lobbying to get myself invited to the local blogging events but i just want to say that I GET JEALOUS. ESPECIALLY and ONLY when it comes to food tasting events.

I mean who wouldn’t? all the free food and the fact that you get to try the food for free saves you $$$ loads from paying for shitty meals. especially when they say their food is of “fine dining” quality. give it 5 years and we still won’t get close to the true definition of fine dining in Brunei.

Unless… unless..they start paying us more 😛 but that’s another story.

My story is, i get jealous BUT on the other hand, i probably wouldn’t like the idea of having to blog nice things about shitty things. I’d probably do it for hard cold cash..but i’d definitely won’t do it for a free meal.

i miss Charcoal.

I’ve been here a month. 2 more months to go. So far there’s nothing to complain about except the fact that i haven’t ran in almost a month and i’m gaining weight fast from sampling all the food items offered at the international pavilions.

TWO weeks ago we were constantly trying not to vomit out our innards from consuming the Prawn Burgers at Lotteria on a daily basis now i’m just trying to keep my temptations under control. It’s so hard not to pop by the Dunkin Donuts across the Brunei pavilion for an extra large Cappuccino. On the way UP to the Pavilion there’s Singapore with their Halal chicken curry and RICE and SHELL-LESS Chilli Crab..(it’s like the WHOLE WORLD have intentionally made it easy for me to get fat kan? haha SHELL-LESS CHILLI CRAB GUYS. CRAB, WITHOUT THE SHELL!!! ) and nearby, i have my theme park style, american churros..from the churros stand, i can see the turkish abangs selling authentic turkish ice-cream, Dondurama. The Turkey Pavilion itself houses an array of halal doner kebabs complete with Lahmacun and Meat-filled Pides. The icing on the cake has got to be the Belgium pavilion that sells my favorite belgian cookies Speculous BY THE PACK and a collection of chocolates by Godiva , Neuhaus and Callibaut…but u know what? ALL THIS GOOD QUALITY CHOCOLATE .. and i’m craving for TIM TAMS. which i managed to SOURCE by the way. YES, I CAN DO EVERYTHING. lol. I’ve made friends with people over in the Australian Pavilion and scored a piece yesterday.

Oh oh. and finally, finally, finally..there’s finally Sushi! the JApanese have opened a food court somewhere in the basement and after month of being sushi deprived.. i finally managed to sink my teeth in to an Inari.

mari lah menari.

jadinya, bepantun. lol.

i should really slow down kali. especially when it costs 18,000 won (about BD$18) for a set of raw fish and another 4,000 won ($4) for a cone of strawberry ice-cream. Singapore has never been more kiasu their chicken curry costs about 15 bucks. I think the malaysians are selling a set of teh tarek and roti canai for $18. haha. exploitation at its zenith. if i keep this up, i don’t think ill be able to afford Lotteria prawn burgers in a few weeks time.

I have the morning off today. Will only start work at 2. its a little bit close to 11.

I should slip on my running shoes and go for a short run. it’s been a while :S

kiss me.

Grocery shopping.

So far, there only seems to be two department stores here in Yeosu. The biggest being Lotte Mart (why of course! i reckon they should just rename their capital city of Seoul to ‘Lotte’!) and the second being E-mart. I prefer e-mart because it’s smaller and they have free wi-fi for shoppers! but for some reason, we always end up at Lotte mart.

Anyway, we were just there earlier this evening. I was looking for Strawberries. FYI, Korea has the best strawberries in the strawberry universe. I don’t know why we bother importing our Strawberries from Australia. Korean Strawberries are fat , berrrryyyyyy juicy and sweet. If you don’t mind the pun 😉 It’s almost like biting in to uh. a big fat juicy sweet stawberry? ah. exactly like that.

with strawberries like these, i don’t know why one would want to indulge in chocolates anymore. #supasave please take note.

so anyway, i found my strawberries and headed towards the dairy section for whipped cream. nothing like the old fashioned strawberries and cream kan? Local products are mainly being sold through out the supermarket but most of their dairy products are imported. As i was browsing the shelves for cream, i caught sight of the prices for butter.

close to 9 bucks!!!??? for BUTTER????. and i thought we had it bad in Brunei. BND$3.10 for 250g of newzealand butter doesn’t seem so bad anymore. i think i finally understand what they mean by “Hujan emas di negeri orang, hujan batu di negeri sendiri, lebih baik negeri sendiri”

Rain fall gold in people country, rain fall stone in own country, better in own country!

I AGREE 100% with you Mr Peribahasa Melayu.

but in anycase, don’t they EAT butter here???? i’m guessing they dont. that’s why they’re all sooooo PERFECTLY SIZED. its like god intentionally made them to be skinny with perfect hair and perfectly clear skin so fat girls like ME with dry dark skin and dry hair would look PERFECTLY PETTY for getting EXTREMELY UPSET over the price they charge for butter!!!

shipal! if i were to sell my brownies here, i’d be selling them for close to a BILLION WON ..per box. lol. 8x8x2.

I also passed by the cheese section and my eyes got even wider when i saw that they were charging close to $16 bucks for CHEESE.

and it’s korean cheese. wtf.

ok. nvm. ill just have strawberries for bfast lunch and dinner from now on.



kiss me.


Here i am sitting cross legged, korean style in a korean styled hotel room ..replying to work mail whilst listening to the likes of Big Bang. It can’t get anymore Korean than that. Wait. actually. it can.. but i refuse to call room service for a bowl of cold stoned rice.

ive succumbed to the world of K-pop. It’s the only way to learn the language, FAST.

lol. who am i kidding? how often would i get a chance to say Naega Jael Cha Laga (I am the best!) ?

and “Nege nege nege ppajyeo Ppajyeo ppajyeo beoryeo baby!” (fell fell fell..fallen fallen baby??”).

Sometimes i wish i could just break in to song whenever speaking to a Korean who doesn’t understand a word of English.

this would be my ideal scenario.

Me: Can you get the cleaners to clean my room?
Hotel Receptionist: dey? ha? [Blank look on face]
Hotel Receptionist: ?
Me: clean ani pun kamu nda kan tahu kah?? “NAEGA JAEL CHA LAGA… TRAT TA TA TA TA TA TA TA TA TA! NO NO NO! NA NA NA !” *shuffle* *shuffle* *shuffle*

anyway, this little fella made my day today.

I saw him walk past me once. and i thought, eh what was is this boy wearing on his head? Whilst waiting for our driver i saw him again and i stopped him for a photo .. and he was more than happy to pose :)

bah eh back to work. krg kana ucap nda kraja. kana ucap kraja ku disini ani blogging saja.

biasa~ mulut org~ racun~~

kiss me.

Chinggam, kenapa kau penipu?

so i’ve decided to post again for the second time today. facetimed with the family and mom told me that she read my blog today and asked me to keep it updated. i’m such a good daughter.

walked to the minimart nearby to get a few bottles of Mul. that’s water in Korean for you (but don’t bother saying it to the girls at the cafe downstairs. they seem proud to be able to pronounce ‘Evian’ the french way. Everytime i ask for Mul, their reply would be.. “Eviang?” and a loud round of APPLAUSE would immediately follow – IN MY HEAD. ) At the minimart, i came across a variety of chewing gum. They had the normal bottled ones but what caught my attention were these Lotte chewing gum (it’s amazing how Lotte started making chewing gum and now runs the whole of Korea) that offered 2 different flavours in 1.

Mcm kacamata atu jua ah? those glasses that would turn dark when you’re out in the sun and back to clear when you’re in the shade? awu bah cinggam ala ala kacamata VVVVIP.

Anyway, They had orange flavored ones that CHANGES to Mint and Mint flavoured ones that changes to GRAPE.. the third one that i saw was labeled ‘Mystery’. Being the curious cat the i am, i chose Mystery only to be dissapointed that it tasted like STRAWBERRY.. the WHOLE TIME. I was chewing on it for a good two hours before accepting the fact that they weren’t going to change flavour.

kirakan mcm SURPRISE, kau kana tipu oleh chinggam.

banar kan? i think i AM in Pyong Yang.


kiss me.

Macam di….Pyong Yang?

I haven’t been much of a blogger these days.

I’m also currently not in the country. Will be a way for most of April,May, June, July and inshallah returning home just in time for the Eid Celebrations. lol. “Eid Celebrations”. who am i kidding? Raya lah! hahaha. hahaha. hahahaha.

Whatever it is, this mini posting i’ve been given..i can’t be more grateful for it. It’s not like i have a choice BUT to be GRATEFUL.

but in anycase, it’s nice to get out of the office and work in the comfort of a hotel for a while. the hotel isn’t much of course. it’s very basic but then again, this isn’t Seoul. I’m located South, of South Korea. The views are scenic, the weather is Spring, but the work is the STORY of Pyong Yang.

Great challenges are coming my way, and it’s fast approaching too. I can only pray to god that i come out of this alive:- stronger and wiser than i was before. inshallah. amin.

i miss food by the way. it seems like Yeosu doesn’t have much to offer apart from the Prawn or Squid burgers from Lotteria. a Korean equivalent to Mcdonalds. Sort of like a Grade “A” version of a Mcdonalds, and they do it very well too!!

There’s also only one Mcdonalds here and Fillet o Fish isn’t on the menu. I’m guessing one needs to catch their fish themselves and bring it to Mcdonalds. Other food items are a hassle to order. People here don’t speak much english, let alone have menus written in the common language. The english friendly restaurants like the one in the hotel however, specializes in BLOW FISH (FML). I’ll leave it for when i’m feeling a little bit more suicidal.

I can’t believe it’s only Tuesday :S Maybe this is a good reason for me to have Blowfish for lunch? lol. they don’t call it suicide tuesdays for nothing. haha.

but hey, it’s SPRING time. We flew in just as the Cherry Blossoms were blooming. Unfortunately, we nly managed to enjoy them for FOUR days before the rain came and blew them away. Initially i thought they’d be around for the whole of spring, turns out they only bloom for a few weeks in a year :S haha but i was lucky enough to see it.

time to go to work. *pasang baju asgai*

kiss me.

No idea what ive been doing all week but i’m exhausted and hungry. I’ve missed out on two weekends this month and i’m finally crashing. Which also subsequently make brownies this weekend OUT OF THE QUESTION. this girl is exhausted and i’m not letting someone by the name of SAS push me further into slavery. y u no understand that? i seriously should start thinking of getting a new phone number for my brownie business.

funny how being in the kitchen used to be relaxing for me. now it’s a bloody chore.

it’s that time of the year again where you find yourself running on auto bot. You wakeup, hop in the shower, have breakfast , drive to work, work, run, come home and sleep. this will be the routine until December. I have a feeling that im not getting leave, UNLESS i decide to quit this year.

i hate my life.